Within two months of their arrival in Canada, the Hurges wrote to my grandmother complaining about their unforeseen difficulties in their new land of choice. There is one important lesson that I’ve learned over the years and it’s this. Apart from the limiting catastrophes of war and climate change, adults deal with their own life challenges, themselves. Immature people (children) try to pass them on to others. The Hurges announced their decision to return to Bristol, England, as soon as possible. They also begged my grandmother for permission to stay with us temporarily until they had found some social and financial stability. These two people were unwilling to face life’s challenges courageously. They were desperate to escape the unavoidable vicissitudes of human existence. Preferring instead to exist in an unreal world of make-believe, and take shelter in the home of a middle-aged woman. If my grandmother knew back then, what I now know, she would have thrown them to the four winds. Because that’s exactly what they needed. For as we read in scripture:
“Do not answer a fool according to his folly, Lest you also be like him.” Proverbs 26:4 (NKJV).
It wasn’t long before they arrived in Bristol, England, and took up residence at our home. They brought all of their accouterments with them, which inconveniently occupied the precious space in our house, and stealthily repossessed all the items they had purchased from my grandmother. Without refunding her one penny. It’s absolutely amazing what unscrupulous people will do, once they feel that they can get away with it. On the surface, my grandmother thought that she was extending charity and compassion to two unfortunate souls in need. But invisible to the naked eye she was just a defenseless sheep, entertaining and being manipulated by two wily wolves. There is a destiny. It is who we are. A combination of all of our character traits. Together with the changes that The Lord Almighty accomplishes within us. As He takes us through the varying life experiences that will change us into better people. Thus preparing us for the life that is to come. Most of the time we know nothing about these coming events. Nor can we avoid them because we aren’t supposed to. But sometimes after many years we finally perceive their true meaning. Essentially, this was my grandmother’s ordeal. Nevertheless, I had to be there. My presence mandated me to carefully observe and learn from everything that I saw and heard. Because I was intended to be a beneficiary of her mistakes. Didn’t the Master Himself warn us,
“Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves. Therefore be wise as serpents and harmless as doves.” Matthew 10:16 (NKJV).
He also cautioned,
“Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces.” Matthew 7:6 (NKJV)
We lived next door to a young couple from Trinidad and Tobago. One day a Postman stopped by and while he was knocking on my neighbor’s door, I heard and went outside to investigate. He asked me if I would be willing to sign and receive a registered letter on behalf of my neighbors since no one was responding to the doorbell. I consented and signed the delivery document. Took the note, along with the registered envelope, and dropped it through our own letter box. Since I was on my way out anyway. Intending to deliver that valuable piece of registered mail upon my return home. When I returned later that same day. To my great consternation and disappointment, even though I searched high and low for that piece of important mail, I couldn’t find it anywhere. I knocked on my neighbor’s door and informed the wife of everything that had transpired. She advised me that she was broke and her brother had sent her eighteen shillings through the mail. Which is precisely what the registered letter contained. I spoke to Mr. Hurge about this development and subsequently my grandmother. His response was sweating, embarrassment, fear, and complaints about being mixed up in a potential police matter. He also urged my grandmother to refund the people next door to avoid any embarrassment to our family.
In those days, in England, no Identification was required to cash a money order. Presumably, Mr. Hurge was broke, a distinct possibility since he was unemployed. I can only surmise that he cashed the check. Erroneously assuming that it had been miss-delivered to the wrong address, and concluded that nothing would come of it. If that’s what occurred, what a criminal act of folly and stupidity? I couldn’t help observing from time to time that Mr. Hurge would have mood swings. Sometimes he was inexplicably happy, laughing, dancing, and jumping around the house like a spring doe. At other times he would sink into a depressed mood and irrationally accuse his wife of doing something to upset him. She invariably rejected his attempts to unjustly project his feelings of dejection unto her. But accused him instead of upsetting himself. Things were more or less normal in our household until several months after their return, we had a cook-fest. My grandmother prepared food and the Hurges did likewise. All of my relative’s deliciously cooked food was gobbled up by my cousin and myself. We also ate Mrs. Hurge’s well-prepared food. Unfortunately, however, the sojourners in our household played around in their helpings of my grandmother’s gastronomic toil and left most of it on their plates. My cousin and I gazed in disappointment at the jerked chicken and baked potatoes, sitting on their plates. As we salivated upon what might have been, had we been given access instead, to that delicious food.
My guardian missed nothing. She had carefully observed every development. A child at heart all she yearned for was love, recognition, respect, and appreciation. They had given her nothing, not even gratitude. Despite all of her efforts on their behalf. She was deeply wounded by their inconsiderate act of brutal callousness. Which she construed to be a rejection of her personally. Almost moved to tears she got up from the table and launched her chair against the wall, beneath the window overlooking the backyard. She threw down the dishes in her hand on the dining table, and they crashed with a loud bang. She marched through the door leading into the kitchen from the dining room and slammed it violently behind her. Immediately thereafter every cabinet door in the kitchen was opened and shut with an explosive crashing sound. The Hurges sat there confused, somewhat fearful but mortified. That very evening my grandmother strung a clothesline across the kitchen ceiling and hung her underwear thereon. So that anyone proceeding into the dining room from the direction of the kitchen would be required to walk beneath them. They both responded by asking her, “What’s wrong Mrs. Donaldson?” Her reply was always, “Nothing.” They were both college graduates. She only had an elementary school education. She found it extraordinarily difficult to explain the pain and volcanic rage boiling deep inside of her.
(TO BE CONTINUED)
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